Writing a eulogy is a deeply personal and often challenging task, even for me at times. It is about creating a tribute that honours the life and legacy of a loved one, encapsulating their essence, achievements and the impact they had on others.
To craft a meaningful and memorable eulogy, one can draw inspiration a myriad of sources including from the arts, and in particularly literature, film and music.
Personally, I LOVE listening to music, I adore watching movies (especially in the cinema) and I'm soothed by the calming act of reading (mainly non-fiction, but still), so these artforms feel like second nature to me.
These creative domains can offer profound insights into the human experience and provide tools to express grief, celebrate life and find solace in darker times.
In this blog, I wanted to take a look at how these mediums can help you write a eulogy, especially if you might be looking for (or lacking) inspiration. (This blog might also help with that).
If that's where you find yourself, here’s how I think you can incorporate these inspirations into a well-crafted eulogy that really sets the stage.
Literature: Finding Words for the Inexpressible
Literature has long been a source of solace and understanding in times of grief.
The rich tapestry of characters, stories and emotions found in countless books can provide a wellspring of inspiration for a eulogy.
Poetic Tributes
Poetry, with its condensed and evocative language, can capture the essence of a person and the depth of your feelings.
If they loved that artform, consider incorporating a poem that resonates with the life of the deceased or the emotions you wish to convey.
For instance, W.H. Auden’s “Funeral Blues” poignantly expresses the sorrow of losing a loved one:
“He was my North, my South, my East and West, my working week and my Sunday rest…”
This excerpt could be used to emphasise the central role the person played in your life.
Literary Quotes
Quotations from classic or contemporary literature can also provide profound insights and articulate emotions that might be difficult to express in your own words.
For example, Harper Lee’s classic book 'To Kill a Mockingbird' offers this reflection on loss:
“People generally see what they look for, and hear what they listen for.”
This quote can remind listeners of the importance of remembering and cherishing the positive moments and qualities of the person who has passed.
Personal Stories
Narrative techniques from literature like those mentioned here (but there are countless others) can help structure your eulogy effectively.
Drawing on elements of storytelling, you can share personal anecdotes that highlight the character, values and memorable moments of the deceased.
Begin with an engaging introduction, develop your anecdotes with vivid details and conclude with a reflective and heartfelt message.
Film: Visualising Life's Narrative
Films are powerful tools for storytelling (not including the Transformers movies, obvs), capable of conveying complex emotions and life stories through visual and auditory elements.
Drawing inspiration from films can enhance your eulogy, making it more vivid and emotionally resonant.
Iconic Scenes and Quotes
Movies often contain scenes or dialogues that encapsulate universal emotions and truths that we can all relate.
Consider referencing a scene that reflects the personality or experiences of your loved one.
For example, the film “The Lion King” which, on one level might just be seen as an animated children's film, but it's one that also addresses the circle of life and the enduring presence of those we have lost:
“They live in you.”
It might not the line of dialogue that immediately comes to mind when you think of this movie, but this simple but profound line can be a reminder of the enduring impact the deceased has on their loved ones.
Cinematic Storytelling
Using the structure of a film plot can help you organise your eulogy.
Think of it in terms of a classic 'Three-Act Structure narrative' with a beginning, a middle and an end.
The beginning can introduce the deceased, perhaps with a focus on their early life and the dreams they pursued.
The middle can delve into their significant achievements and relationships, while the end can reflect on their legacy and the lasting impressions they leave behind.
Music and Soundtracks
Films are also known for their music, which can evoke powerful emotions. Including a reference to a beloved movie soundtrack or song can add a layer of emotional depth to your eulogy.
For instance, if your loved one had a favourite movie score, you could mention how the music from that film always seemed to capture their spirit and mood.
Music: The Language of the Soul
As I touched upon earlier, outside of my family, music means the world to me. It has a unique ability to express what words often cannot, no matter what mood you find yourself. It certainly does for me.
Regardless of genre, music can capture the essence of a person’s life, evoke memories and provide comfort in times of sorrow.
Incorporating musical elements into your eulogy can create a deeply moving experience, or even a funny moment. I know someone who went to a funeral were they played the Coronation Street theme tune. Fact.
Lyrics and Songs
If music played a part in their life, consider including lyrics from a song that was significant to the deceased or that encapsulates the emotions you wish to convey.
For instance, “Over the Rainbow” by Harold Arlen and Yip Harburg (usually associated with the film The Wizard of Oz) can be a poignant choice:
“Somewhere over the rainbow, skies are blue, And the dreams that you dare to dream really do come true.”
This song can symbolise hope and the idea of a peaceful afterlife.
Musical Metaphors
Pulling straight from the lyrics isn't the only way to build music into the eulogy.
Think about using musical metaphors can help illustrate the impact of the deceased on your life and the lives of others.
For example, you might say:
“Their life was like a beautiful melody, full of unexpected harmonies and unforgettable rhythms that will continue to resonate in our hearts.”
Live Performances
If appropriate, think about incorporating a live musical performance into the eulogy can be incredibly powerful.
A family member or friend performing an appropriate piece that was meaningful to the deceased can create a poignant and memorable moment for everyone present.
Integrating the Arts into Your Eulogy
Preparation and Reflection
Before you start writing, take time to reflect on the deceased’s favourite books, films, and music.
Consider what artistic works they cherished and how these can be woven into your eulogy. What song did they have on repeat? What film did they love watching? Which books couldn't they put down?
This personal touch not only honours their passions, but also provides a richer, more relatable tribute.
There's bound to be celebrants in attendance who share their love of that song, movie or book too.
Balancing Emotion and Narrative
I believe a successful eulogy always balances emotion with narrative. While it’s important to convey your feelings, structuring your speech with clear, engaging stories and references to the arts can help maintain the audience’s attention and provide comfort.
For example, you might start with a quote from a favourite book, segue into a personal story and conclude with a song lyric that encapsulates your message.
Practicing Delivery
It's important to remember that the delivery of your eulogy is as important as its content.
Practice reading it aloud, paying attention to your tone, pace and emotional expression.
If you plan to include quotes, poems, or musical references, practice integrating these seamlessly into your speech.
Personalising the Eulogy
Ultimately, the most important aspect of a eulogy is its authenticity. Speak from the heart, and let the inspiration you draw from literature, film, and music serve as a framework to express your unique relationship with the deceased.
Personal stories, meaningful quotes and beloved songs can all work together to create a tribute that is both personal and universally resonant.
Example Eulogy Structure
Introduction: Begin with a quote from a favorite book or film.
Early Life: Share anecdotes from the deceased’s early life, perhaps using a literary narrative style.
Achievements and Relationships: Highlight significant moments and relationships, integrating quotes or lyrics that resonate.
Personal Reflection: Offer a personal story that captures the essence of the deceased.
Conclusion: End with a hopeful message, possibly incorporating a musical reference or live performance.
Final Thoughts...
Crafting a eulogy is an art form that allows us to honour and remember our loved ones in a profound and meaningful way.
We can all take inspiration from a multitude of sources but by drawing inspiration from literature, film and music, we can create a tribute that captures the essence of the deceased and provides solace to those who are grieving.
These artistic elements offer a rich language to express our deepest emotions and connect with others in times of loss.
Remember, a heartfelt eulogy is not just about saying goodbye, but also about celebrating the life that was lived and the legacy that continues to inspire.
Thanks for reading. I hope that you have enjoyed this blog on how you can incorporate the arts into a eulogy. I'd love to know what you think.
Do you think it's appropriate to build lyrics, poems or film quotes into a eulogy? Are there any that you would pick for yours? Have you been to funeral and heard them done well (or badly)? Let me know in the comments below.
Remember if you need any help writing a eulogy for a loved ones who's recently passed, please consider using my services. I won't let you down. You can find out more right here. I hope to hear from you soon.
Main blog photo by Eilis Garvey on Unsplash
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