What Makes Us Sentimental?

There are moments in life that catch us off guard. A song we have not heard in years comes on the radio, and suddenly we are no longer in the present but standing in an old kitchen, hearing a loved one hum along as they made tea. We open a drawer and find an old birthday card, the handwriting instantly pulling us back into another time. A familiar scent of a favourite food, a photograph or a phrase someone used to say, these small things can stir emotions far bigger than the objects themselves.

This is sentimentality; the deep emotional resonance that everyday moments, memories and objects can hold.

Sentimentality is sometimes dismissed as overly emotional or even indulgent, but in truth, I think it is one of the most profoundly human aspects of grief, memory and love. It is closely tied to the way we make meaning from our lives and relationships. In the context of a eulogy, sentimentality often becomes not only natural but essential. It is the emotional thread that helps me transform memories into tribute and sorrow into remembrance.

When we ask what makes us sentimental, I think what we are really asking is what makes us human, so let's talk about it.

Photo by Kelly Sikkema on Unsplash

What Exactly Is Sentimentality?

At its heart, and whilst it might sound a little clinical, sentimentality is the emotional value we attach to people, places, objects, and moments. It is not merely sadness, nor is it simply nostalgia. Rather, for me, it is the feeling that something carries emotional significance beyond its practical use or surface meaning.

A watch is never just a watch when it belonged to your late father, who wore it every day for forty years. A worn armchair is never just furniture when it was where your grandma sat reading stories to you or her grandchildren. A phrase like “drive safely” can become treasured when it was always the final thing someone said before departing.

Sentimentality happens when memory and meaning fuse together. I look at it as the mind’s way of preserving emotional connections. We invest moments with feeling, and over time those moments become symbols of love, loss, comfort, identity and belonging.

Far from being irrational, sentimentality is often how we maintain continuity between past and present.

Why Do People Become Sentimental?

At its basic level, I think people become sentimental because relationships matter.

As human beings, we are deeply relational creatures. Much of our identity is shaped by the people around us, whether that's family, friends, partners, teachers or colleagues. When experiences are shared with those people, they become emotionally charged. Consequently, the more meaningful the relationship, the stronger the emotional imprint.

I think this connection is why seemingly trivial things can provoke such powerful responses. The item itself may be ordinary, but what it represents is much more than that.

A chipped mug may remind someone of quiet mornings with their spouse. A football scarf may recall years of matches attended with a parent. A recipe card may carry the presence of someone long gone.

Sentimentality is often rooted in association. The brain links objects, places, sounds and smells to emotional memories. Because memory is rarely purely factual, these associations are rich with feeling.

In many ways, sentimentality is memory made emotional. It is less about the object and more about what the object unlocks in them.

The Psychology Behind Sentimentality

From a psychological perspective, and as I've just touched upon, sentimentality is connected to memory, attachment and identity.

Memories are not stored in our brains as neutral facts. They are often encoded alongside emotional states, which is why emotionally significant events are remembered more vividly than routine ones.

When something in the present mirrors part of that memory, whether that's a voice, a smell or an image, it can reactivate not only the recollection but the emotion itself.

This is why sentimentality can feel so immediate.

A person is not simply remembering; they are emotionally re-experiencing.

Sentimentality is also linked to attachment theory. We form bonds with people, and those bonds continue to shape us even after separation or death. In grief, sentimental feelings can become especially intense because the mind searches for ways to preserve that connection.

Holding onto sentimental items or memories is often a way of saying that this relationship still matters. Rather than weakness, I think it can be a healthy expression of continuing bonds.

Sentimentality and Grief

When someone dies, ordinary memories often become precious. Things once overlooked suddenly seem profound. As such, grief heightens sentimentality because loss sharpens meaning, whether that's:

• The sound of their laugh.

• The way they folded a newspaper.

• Their favourite chair.

• The texts they always sent.

Grief magnifies these details because they are now among the few tangible ways the person remains present in our lives. This is why people, myself included, often become more sentimental after bereavement.

They revisit photographs, keep belongings, replay conversations in their minds and cherish small rituals that keep the memory alive.

These acts are not simply about sadness; they are acts of remembrance. This sentimentality in grief helps bridge the painful gap between physical absence and emotional presence.

What Makes Sentimentality So Powerful in a Eulogy?

As a professional eulogy writer, I'm under no illusions that a eulogy is, by its very nature, an act of sentiment.

It asks us to gather memories, emotions and meaning into words that honour a life.

The most moving eulogies are rarely those that list achievements in a detached way. Instead, they are often the ones that include the deeply human details; the quirks, habits, jokes and moments that reveal the essence of the person.

This is where sentimentality becomes really powerful.

A eulogy might mention the way someone always burned the toast but insisted it tasted better that way. It might recall the phrase they used every Christmas morning.

It may describe the sound of their laugh filling the room. These details move people because they feel true. They create recognition. Those present are not merely hearing about the deceased; they are feeling them again.

Sentimentality transforms a eulogy from a formal speech into a shared emotional experience. It reminds everyone gathered not just that a person lived, but how they lived and what they meant.

The Difference Between Genuine Sentiment and Cliché

For all the eulogies I write for clients, there is an important distinction between authentic sentimentality and empty sentiment.

For me, genuine sentimentality is specific. It lives in the details they share with me.

Cliché sentimentality tends to rely on broad phrases that could apply to anyone. Things like "they lit up every room", "they were loved by all" or "they will never be forgotten"

While these sentiments may be true or even sincere, they can lack any emotional depth if unsupported by real memory. True sentimentality comes from the particular.

Instead of saying someone was kind, describe the time they drove two hours in the rain to help a friend. Instead of saying they were funny, recall the terrible joke they told at every family dinner.

Specificity makes sentiment believable and emotionally resonant. This is especially important in eulogies, where authenticity matters far more than polished language.

As I often say to my clients, the most touching tributes often come from honest, lived moments.

Why Sentimentality Matters in Remembering a Life

Sentimentality helps preserve individuality.

After a loss, there is often a fear that the person will fade into abstraction, reduced to dates, roles and facts. A eulogy resists that. It brings personality back into focus.

The sentimental memories are often the ones that capture who someone truly was.

Not their job title. Not their formal accomplishments, but the things that made them unmistakably themselves.

This can be the song they always sang in the car. The garden they loved. The stories they told repeatedly. The way they made people feel. These sentimental details do something profound; they restore presence.

For a moment, the person feels close again. That is one of the great emotional functions of a eulogy and what I'm always striving for when writing for my clients.

Photo by Laura Fuhrman on Unsplash

Can We Be Too Sentimental?

I've heard some people worry that sentimentality can become overwhelming or overly emotional. In truth, I don't believe there is a "right" level of feeling in grief, but what does matter is sincerity.

A eulogy does not need to suppress emotion. In fact, emotion often helps others feel less alone in their grief. Tears, laughter and sentiment all have a place.

The key, as it is with many things, is balance.

A good eulogy uses sentiment not to overwhelm but to illuminate. With those I write, I always try to help mourners recognise the life being honoured and the impact that life had.

Sometimes the most sentimental lines are also the simplest.

• “He never left without saying, ‘I love you.’”

• “She always made everyone feel like they belonged.”

Sure, these lines are simple, but they endure because they are emotionally honest.

The PostScript: What Makes Us Sentimental, Ultimately?

Ultimately, and to answer the title of this blog, I think what makes us sentimental is something we can all feel....love.

We become sentimental because other people matter to us, because moments with them leave marks and because those precious memories allow those marks, however mundane they may seem to others, to remain long after time has passed.

Sentimentality is the emotional evidence of these connections.

In the context of a eulogy, it becomes one of the most meaningful tools we have. It allows us to speak not just about death, but about life, relationships and legacy. A truly heartfelt eulogy does not shy away from sentiment. It embraces it, at least the ones I write do! Because in those tender, memory-filled moments, we often come closest to expressing what someone really meant to us.

And perhaps that is what sentimentality is at its core; love refusing to be forgotten.

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I'd love to know what you think. What things make you immediately think of your loved ones? What do you think will make people think of you when you're gone? Alternatively, do you think we can be too sentimental? Let me know your thoughts in the comments below. I read and reply to all of them.

If you're in need of a bespoke eulogy for a loved one, please get in touch and let's have a chat about how I can help. All the ways to do that are linked here.

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