The Importance of Endings

When we gather to remember someone we love, words spoken in the present also become our bridge to the past, our way of holding onto memories that might otherwise slip away.

Eulogies are those heartfelt speeches that capture the essence of a person’s life, their quirks, their kindness and their impact on us. But have you ever stopped to think about the ending of a eulogy? That final note, the closing sentiment, the last impression left in the hearts of those listening? As a professional eulogy writer, I believe that’s where the importance of eulogy endings truly shines.

Over the last couple of years, I’ve spent a lot of time helping people craft these delicate speeches, and I can tell you, whilst most people understandably focus on getting the opening right or coming up with the best anecdotes in the middle, the way a eulogy wraps up can be just as powerful as the stories told beforehand.

It’s like the final brushstroke on a painting or the last chord in a song; it lingers, it resonates, and it helps us say goodbye in a way that feels right.

Why the Importance of Eulogy Endings Can’t Be Overstated

Think about the last time you watched a movie or read a book. How often do you remember the ending more than the beginning? I'd say it's more often than not. However much you might have been engaged watching a movie or reading a book, it can be ruined by a terrible ending. I believe that’s because endings have a special power. They give us closure, a sense of peace, or sometimes a gentle nudge to carry on.

Whilst this is true in every medium, in a eulogy, the ending is your chance to:

• Summarise the essence of the person’s life in a few meaningful words.

• Offer comfort to those grieving, reminding them they’re not alone.

• Inspire hope or reflection, helping everyone present to find a way forward.

For example, I once helped a family end their eulogy with a simple but profound line: “Though we say goodbye today, the love we shared will always be our guiding light”. He'd been a miner in his younger days, so it served two meanings. They later told me it was a moment that brought tears and smiles to those in attendance, a perfect blend of sorrow and hope. A job well done.

Ending a eulogy well is like closing a door gently, not slamming it shut. It honours the past while opening a window to the future.

Photo by Chandler Langley on Unsplash

What Are The Three Main Points of a Eulogy?

If you need a eulogy and are wondering how to structure a eulogy, in my experience, it often helps to focus on three main points. These act like the pillars holding up your tribute, making it clear, heartfelt and memorable.

1. Who They Were - This is where you paint a picture of the person’s character, their passions and what made them unique. Were they a lover of gardening, a devoted friend, or a passionate poet? Whatever it was, share those details that bring them to life.

2. What They Meant to You and Others - Here, you reflect on the impact they had. Maybe they were the glue that held the family together, or the one who always knew how to make you laugh on a tough day. Personal stories work wonders here.

3. How They Will Be Remembered - Whilst much of a eulogy looks back in time, this is the forward-looking part. What legacy do they leave behind? What lessons did they teach? How will their memory continue to inspire?

By keeping these three points in mind, you can create a eulogy that feels complete and meaningful. Don't forget, the ending should tie all these points together, giving your speech a sense of closure, warmth and cohesion.

When The End Isn't The End

Now, here’s where things get really interesting. Often, the end of the eulogy isn't always the end of the story, but it's why getting it right matters so much.

If you've been to a funeral, you may well have heard those thoughtful additions or final remarks that come after the main eulogy. These usually occur as people begin to gather outside the service or reminisce about the deceased at the wake.

Whilst these tales are obviously not part of the eulogy itself, they're 100% inspired by it. Think of them as the cherry on top or the soft whisper after the main story has been told. They're how the deceased lives on.

Photo by Aaron Burden on Unsplash

Practical Tips for Writing Your Eulogy Ending

Writing the ending of a eulogy can feel as daunting as the opening. After all, how do you sum up a whole life in just a few sentences?

Here are some of my practical tips to help you craft an ending that feels just right.

• Keep it Simple and Sincere - You don’t need grand speeches or fancy words. Sometimes, the most powerful endings are the simplest.

• Use a quote or poem that meant something to the person or reflects their spirit.

• Express Gratitude - Thank the attendees for their support or the person for the impact they had.

• Look Forward with Hope - Acknowledge the pain you're all feeling, but also the strength and love that remain.

• Practice reading it aloud to make sure it flows naturally and feels comfortable. (This blog might help with this too)

  
  

Above all, remember your ending is your final gift to the memory of your loved one. It’s OK to pause, take a breath and let your emotions guide you.

The PostScript - Why Every Life Story Deserves a Beautiful Ending

In the end, a eulogy is more than just words. It’s a way to honour a life, to share love and to find comfort in community. The importance of eulogy endings lies in their ability to bring all these elements together in a moment of grace.

Whether you’re speaking at a funeral, writing your own legacy, or supporting someone through grief, remember that the ending is your chance to leave a lasting impression. It’s the final note in a symphony of memories, the last hug in a room full of tears.

If you ever find yourself struggling with this part, know that help is available. Services like mine should aim to be the go-to support for crafting deeply personal and meaningful eulogies. I understand the delicate balance of empathy, humour and honesty needed to honour every life story beautifully.

So, take your time, speak from the heart, and know that your words will be a lasting tribute - a gentle, loving farewell that echoes in the hearts of all who listen.

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Thank you for taking the time to explore the importance of eulogy endings with me. I do appreciate you reading my post. I'd love to know what you think. Have you heard any eulogies with great endings? How would your own eulogy end? What's the lasting thought you'd want to leave your family and friends with? Let me know in the comments below.

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