Writing a eulogy is never easy, trust me I do it for a living. As hard as it is, it becomes even more emotionally challenging when the person you are writing about has died much younger than expected.
A life cut short leaves a profound void, not just in the hearts of those who loved them, but in the stories that never had the chance to unfold. Yet, every life - regardless of how long or short - carries a meaningful legacy. So let's explore that.
Writing A Eulogy For A Young Person. A Life Lived Regardless
Crafting a eulogy for someone who has passed away too soon involves reflecting on their unique impact, the memories they leave behind, and the promise their life still holds.
In this post, I wanted to explore how to capture the essence of a life that ended prematurely, with strategies to craft a eulogy that honours the individual’s journey, celebrates their legacy and provides comfort to those mourning the loss.
If you're in the position of writing a eulogy for a young person, or someone who's life was cut short, then I'm here to help.
Please note, in the examples I've used within this post, I've added random names to help illustrate my point. If any of them are triggering for you, I apologise, but they aren't meant to relate to anyone in particular and are just there to help give them a more real-world feel. Any coincidences with anyone you may know are just that and can obviously be swapped out should you choose to 'borrow' those passages.
The Emotional Weight of Writing a Eulogy for a Young Person
Losing someone who had much life ahead of them feels inherently unfair.
Whether the deceased was a child, teenager, young adult, or someone in the prime of life, the emotions are often overwhelming - grief mingled with sorrow for the future they never had.
This makes writing a eulogy not only an emotional task, but one that requires deep sensitivity.
A eulogy is often an opportunity to give voice to the person’s story, no matter how unfinished it feels.
It’s not about the number of years they lived, but how they lived those years and the ways they touched the lives of those around them.
Begin with Honouring Their Spirit
The first step in crafting a eulogy for someone who died young is to honour the essence of their spirit.
Think about how they lived, what made them unique and what they brought into the world.
Did they have a contagious laugh, an adventurous spirit, or a kind heart that touched everyone they met? Perhaps they were a dreamer with big ambitions or someone who always knew how to make others feel important.
In these early stages, you want to reflect on the qualities that defined them, rather than focusing solely on the brevity of their life.
This helps to create a tone of celebration amid the sorrow. You are not ignoring the tragedy of their passing but acknowledging that their life - however short - was meaningful.
For example, if writing about a young adult who passed away, you might say:
"Though Alex’s time with us was much too brief, his love of life was boundless. He approached every day with an insatiable curiosity and the energy to turn even the smallest moments into adventures. His laugh could light up a room, and his compassion for others left a lasting impression on everyone lucky enough to know him."
Focus on the Impact They Made
One challenge in writing a eulogy for someone who died young is the natural inclination to think they didn’t have enough time to accomplish 'significant' things. But significance isn’t measured in milestones or societal expectations. It’s measured in the effect someone had on the people around them.
Rather than lamenting what they didn’t get to do, focus on the impact they did have.
Perhaps they showed extraordinary kindness to others, had a close circle of friends or family who they loved deeply, or pursued passions that gave them joy.
It's always a good idea to ask family and friends for stories and anecdotes that highlight the ways the deceased made an impact, however small it may seem.
For example, you could something like:
"Though Sarah was only 17, her heart was filled with the love and generosity of a person much older. She had an incredible ability to make those around her feel seen and valued. Whether it was through her art, her quiet strength, or the way she championed her friends, Sarah left an indelible mark on everyone she encountered."
Acknowledge the Unfinished Chapters
It’s impossible to avoid the fact that someone’s life has ended before many chapters of their book were written, but there's a fine balance to consider.
Ignoring this aspect can feel disingenuous, but dwelling on it too heavily can detract from the focus on their life.
The key, I believe, is to acknowledge that sense of incompleteness without making it the focal point.
You might reflect on their dreams and aspirations, recognising that while they did not come to fruition, those dreams reflected their spirit and character.
Speak of these ambitions with a sense of admiration and respect for what they hoped to achieve. For instance:
"Jason had big plans for his future. He dreamed of becoming a teacher, of helping others learn and grow the way he had. He talked often about the places he wanted to see, the things he wanted to accomplish, and the person he hoped to become. Though those dreams were tragically cut short, they remain a testament to the bright and driven person Jason was."
Incorporate Symbols and Metaphors
When someone’s life feels unfinished, it can be helpful to use symbols or metaphors that represent the transient beauty of life.
This can bring a sense of peace and understanding to the eulogy, framing their life as a beautiful, albeit short, journey.
Consider using nature-inspired metaphors, such as comparing their life to a star that burned brightly but faded too soon, or to a flower that blossomed early and filled the world with its beauty for a brief moment.
For example:
"Like a summer flower that blooms early, Liam’s life was a burst of colour, light and joy. Though his time was short, the beauty he brought into the world will be remembered forever. His laughter, his kindness, and his love will live on in the hearts of those who were lucky enough to know him."
Create a Narrative of Love and Connection
When writing a eulogy for someone who has died young, it’s essential to focus on the love they gave and received.
Even in a short life, relationships often form the core of a person’s legacy.
Reflect on the close bonds they shared with their family, friends and others. These relationships give meaning to their life and provide comfort to those grieving.
Consider writing about the joy and connection they brought into the lives of those around them.
Highlight the moments of love, no matter how fleeting, and show how their presence was a gift to those who knew them.
Statements like:
"Maya’s love for her family was unmatched. She cherished every moment spent with her parents and siblings, always putting them first and making sure they knew how much they were loved. Her best friend described her as the glue that held their group together, someone who always knew how to brighten the darkest of days."
Provide Comfort to the Grieving
A eulogy is not only a tribute to the deceased but also a source of comfort for the grieving.
This is especially important when the loss feels senseless or unjust, as it often does when someone dies young.
As you conclude the eulogy, it's a good idea to try to offer words that bring solace to those mourning the loss.
You might remind those listening that while the person is no longer with them in body, their memory, love and spirit will continue to live on.
Reflecting on the positive impact they had, even in a short time, can offer a sense of peace. For example:
"Though Jack’s time with us was far too short, his legacy is one of love, kindness, and joy. His spirit will continue to live on in all the lives he touched. We may not understand why he had to leave us so soon, but we can honour him by carrying forward the light and love he brought into this world."
The Final Word
Writing a eulogy for a life cut short is a task filled with emotion and sensitivity. While it may be tempting to dwell on the loss, the goal of the eulogy should always be to celebrate the life that was lived, however brief it may have been.
By focusing on the unique spirit of the person, the impact they made on others and the love they shared, anyone can craft a eulogy that not only honours their legacy but also provides comfort to those left behind.
It’s not about the number of years, but the depth of their presence in the lives of those who loved them.
In the end, a eulogy for someone who died young is a testament to the profound truth that a life doesn’t have to be long to be meaningful.
Thank you for taking the time to read my latest post. With all the other things you could be doing, I do appreciate you spending time on my website. I hope it helped and I'd love to know what you think.
Have you been affected by the loss of someone who died young? How did their eulogy capture their spirit? Did you write it and if so, how did you approach it? If not, was it done well? Let me know in the comments below.
If you need help, either with writing a bespoke eulogy of need a professional edit on one you've wrote already, please get in touch or take a look at the website linked here. I'd be more than happy help you with either to help highlight the positive change they made to the world through the written word.
Comments